These are the days of Grace~~ Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude. By Denis Waitley
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Miss you like crazy
It's been five years...some days I wonder how the time has flown by; other days it just drags. There's rarely a day goes by that something doesn't remind me of you - some fragrance or a song. Perhaps it's the way Gracie claps her hands together all excited like you used to do or it's the smell of those nut goodies. Today it was peanut butter. Crazy. I'm glad to say that finally...finally the smiles out number the tears. When things were raw & the loss was fresh, I often worried because I could only see you in those last months - the very sick you. What frailty & brokenness. But now my vision has cleared & I see you in your smiles, thoughtful ways & tenderness. I miss you still, but I'm so glad that joy is more than the sorrow. Miss you like crazy, mom. Love you always & forever; to the moon & back again. We're throwing kisses to heaven!
Glowing, gloating mom of one bright lil girl. My days are filled with ballerina dances, books, balls and bubbles along with all that comes with being a mom. My real, full time job is to teach Grace how to love God, herself and others. On the side, I am in private practice as a Child Development Specialist and Developmental Therapist working with infants/toddlers with special needs. I absolutely LOVE IT! It's really not even fair to call it work. Whew! I finally earned that Speech Language Pathologist degree, license and all. A 2nd Masters is under the belt. EARN being the key word. Thank you, Lord! HA! I live for God and love this journey despite rough terrain at times. I love where it has taken me and I'm learning to be content back home again. Remember: you cannot drive with your eyeballs glued to the rear view mirror- it is only for glancing back!
Sooner or later you figure out life is constructed specifically and brilliantly to squeeze a man into association with the Owner of heaven. It is a struggle, with labor pains and thorny landscape, bloody hands and sweaty brow, head in hands, moments of severe loneliness and questioning, moments of ache and desire. All this leads to God, I think... Matter and thought are a canvas on which God paints, a painting with tragedy and delivery, with sin and redemption. Life is a dance toward God, I begin to think. And the dance is not so graceful as we might want. While we glide and swing our practiced sway, God crowds our feet, bumps our toes, and scuffs our shoes. So we learn to dance with the One who made us. And it is a difficult dance to learn, because its steps are foreign. - Donald Miller